Battle of the She-Titans – Attack of the 50 Foot Cheerleader (2012)

Attack of the 50 Foot Cheerleader
While you might automatically think that this film would have something to do with Attack of the 50 Foot Woman, either the original or the remake, you would be sorely mistaken. Aside from the very large women in this film, there is nothing that relates one to the other in any manner. The film was produced by Roger Corman whose presence can be felt in every aspect of every scene and directed by Kevin O’Neill who did the best he could with what he was given, which was not a lot.

attack-50-foot-cheerleader-700Essentially, the film finds Cassie an ugly duckling who wants to join a sorority, become a cheerleader, get the guy and impress her mom played by Sean Young. In order to achieve that, Cassie injects herself with an experimental serum from the lab she works in and it is not long before the least popular girl in school is doing all the things she ever wanted including finding herself in an all-out topless brawl with the head cheerleader Brittany as she-giants at the big game.

A lot of this movie borders on being terrible, if not actually atrocious such as the music which sounds like the soundtrack to a live-action television show for toddlers; purely infantile stuff and if it was meant to be funny, it was a miserable failure. attack-50-foot-cheerleader06The acting was horrendous from everyone involved, even Treat Williams who must have needed the cash pretty bad to appear in this film. The dialogue was not much better and the story, while familiar as it has been seen in many a Cinderella movie, would have worked better if everything around it had been much improved.

On the plus side, everyone looked pretty, except for pirate guy, and for those who might have guessed, there was a little nudity involved as well, including the aforementioned topless battle. What was really surprising was that the film actually contained a couple of moments that were genuinely funny and elicited a chuckle, so not everything in the picture was all that bad.

Despite it all though, even the good stuff, the film was truly awful, but you do not feel as if you threw away an hour and a half of the time allotted to you in this life. For that fact alone, Attack of the 50 Foot Cheerleader is not necessarily worth it, but not a complete waste of time either.

2 out of 5

2015 Edition

First EntryTrapped in the… – Valley of the Dragons (1961)
Second EntryCan You Feel the… – Tremors (1990)
Third EntryBeauty and Danger Collide in… – Viking Women and the Sea Serpent (1957)
Fourth EntryDance the Night Away in the… – Village of the Giants (1965)
Fifth EntryIt Was a Time… – When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth (1970)
Sixth EntryDo Not Fall Into the Grasp of… – The Giant Claw (1957)
Seventh EntryWho Knew They Could Give Birth? – Tremors 2: Aftershocks (1996)
Eighth EntrySo Many to Choose From – The Loves of Hercules (1960)
Ninth EntryShould Have Stayed Down Below – Up From the Depths (1979)
Tenth EntrySnakes On a Boat! – Anaconda (1997)
Eleventh EntryThink Twice Before You Cheat – Attack of the 50 Foot Woman (1958)
Twelfth EntryBack to the Trough – Tremors 3: Back to Perfection (2001)
Thirteenth EntryPast and Present Collide in… – Mega Shark Versus Mecha Shark (2014)
Fourteenth EntryMating Season – Anacondas: Hunt for the Blood Orchid (2004)
Fifteenth EntryA Land Before Time – One Million Years B.C. (1966)

Last Year’s Creatures…

Giant Monster Gamera (1965)
The Monolith Monsters (1957)
Gamera vs. Barugon (1966)
Tarantula (1955)
Gamera vs. Gyaos (1967)
Attack of the Crab Monsters (1957)
Gamera vs. Viras (1968)
The Cyclops (1957)
Gamera vs. Guiron (1969)
Monsters (2010)
Gamera vs. Jiger (1970)
The Killer Shrews (1959)
Gamera vs. Zigra (1971)
The Deadly Mantis (1957)
Space Monster Gamera (1980)
King Dinosaur (1955)
Gamera: Guardian of the Universe (1995)
The Black Scorpion (1957)
Gamera 2: Attack of Legion (1996)
Them! (1954)
Gamera 3: The Revenge of Iris (1999)
The Giant Gila Monster (1959)
Gamera the Brave (2006)
Frankenstein Conquers the World (1966)

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