Movies and Film

Of All Things,… – Mars Needs Women (1967)

Mars needs women. Such is the mysterious message that is received upon the Earth and while they seem pretty confused about it, it is straight to the point. The populace of Mars, which humanity has been unaware of thus far, are unable to conceive those of the female gender and without those of the opposite sex, they will eventually die out. So it is that the Martians come to Earth in the hopes of absconding, either willingly or forcibly, with a number of Earth’s finest ladies in order to jump-start their race.

Made for television, Mars Needs Women does not even seem to have a budget fit for the small screen and it definitely suffers because of it. The story is laughable, but one has to give props to all of those involved for trying their best at making a very serious science-fiction picture. That being said, as serious as they try to be, it simply never works and turns out to be an overlong and bloated episode of what should have been a Twilight Zone episode. The acting is somewhat forced at times with lead Tommy Kirk being the biggest offender, though he does tend to mellow out just a little bit once he starts to share the screen with Yvonne Craig.

Like many others before them, Edgar Rice Burroughs for one, the filmmakers picture their aliens in human form which would explain why the Martians would think Terran women would be compatible with their own men. That brings up the numerous plot holes throughout, if one were to actually sit and think about it, such as how would the Martians actually know that women from Earth would suffice and if they are so technologically advanced, would they not have the ability to clone at this point in time? Could they not simply manufacture their own women from scratch or is their technology limited. Also why not simply attack the Earth or teleport/transport some women without announcing themselves to the planet? Turning one’s brain off is a must as it is all very silly to be sure, truly being a ridiculous movie through and through with little that anyone could call redeeming, at least aside from Craig that is.

Not worth the time or effort unless enamoured of the terrible.

1 out of 5

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