Horror

At Least Taste It – Microwave Massacre (1983)


Microwave Massacre is an awful film. It is not necessarily because of what it features, there having been many films about cannibals over the years from Cannibal Holocaust to Ravenous to Raw and all of them better than this particular movie, it is terrible simply because of everything that went into it. What is most strange about it though is that no matter how bad it gets, it is almost impossible to stop watching because seeing where it goes nearly becomes essential. Everything about this movie is dreadful, but it falls into that rarefied category of being so bad that it also happens to be good and while nobody could actually love this film, it keeps you hooked in from beginning to end.

There is every chance that this movie could have been better if they had replaced lead actor Jackie Vernon and suffice it to say, that never happened and so it is that the audience has to suffer through his whining and bumbling for the entirety of the film’s running time. He is by far, the worst actor one will ever encounter no matter how many terrible films that they watch and it is painful to the ears to listen to him go from unhappy husband to serial killer/cannibal. Still, no matter how bad it got, seeing him complete his journey was a must, just to see where it would lead. Would the random blond in the film become one of the victims, the girl who served absolutely no purpose other than being obligatory eye candy? Would Donald meet his end at the hands of the cops or from one of his intended victims who would eventually decide to fight back? The film could have went anywhere and when that ending eventually came, it was of course, a letdown.

Awful is a word that probably does this movie a favour because it is worse than that and yet there is something about it that commands attention. The script is bad, the acting worse, the direction uninspired and everything else about it horrible, but it is at the end of the day, something that has to be seen to be believed.

0.5 out of 5

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