The third and final movie of the Lost Boys franchise is here and it takes place a little time after the second one. During the end credits of The Tribe, Edgar Frog was facing off against Corey Haim reprising his character of Sam Emerson who had been turned into a vampire.  Assumedly, Edgar defeated him because here he is in a third movie to the franchise featuring Feldman in the lead role this time around instead of being the supporting actor.  While the second movie took a real nose dive on a lot of counts, this film, while not much better, seemed to have a larger budget as the production looked much improved.  Sadly it still did not have a script or anything to really recommend it much higher than the last one.

This film finally lets us in on what exactly happened to Alan Frog who had been missing during the last film and we find out that he has been turned into a vampire and why it was Edgar was solo for awhile.  This film also sees Edgar in financial straits as he is bankrupt and when opportunity comes knocking in the form of a beautiful woman, he has little choice but to accept.  It seems that Gwen’s little brother has been abducted by a vampire known as DJ X, a vampire who happens to be, of all things, a DJ.  DJ X is intent on turning everyone who goes to his raves all over the world into vampires so that he might create an unstoppable army.  Edgar will not let that happen.  So he sets off to find himself a partner and when his vampiric brother says no, he finds himself some others in the form of the girl who works at the comic store as well as another guy that his employer Gwen has hired.  Together they invade the island where the latest rave is being held and it all leads to a showdown with the head vampire, DJ X.  But after everything goes down, Edgar and crew find out that nothing is that easy.

When the second movie ended, it was a good spot to do so even with the unanswered questions, but as it made a ton of money from unsuspecting people who thought it would be as good as the first, a third one was inevitable.  And so here we are with a third film that is hardly an improvement with many of the same failings.  The script, if it could be called that, was terrible.  The story of the film was good, it was the execution of it, and being turned into actual lines for the cast to read and perform is where it all fell apart.  Being half dialogue and half one-liners, the script by returning writer Hans Rodionoff and newcomer to the franchise, Evan Charnov, was terrible from start to finish.  The one-liners were delivered mainly by star Feldman with most of the dialogue being given to the supporting cast.  How the script was ever greenlit is a miracle in itself.

The direction by Dario Piana, was surprisingly all right with the previously mentioned production values looking better than they had during the second film.  Due to The Tribe selling so well, it looks as if a little of that money was spent to make this film look a little slicker and surprisingly, it worked.  The makeup on our vamps was better, though generic, than the previous movie and there were more explosions and action scenes as well.  In the vein of more is better, there is also a lot more blood and guts, a lot more nudity and a lot more Feldman.

Our hero.

Sadly, Feldman was hardly any better than he was in The Tribe, with him grunting, moaning, sighing, growling and spouting off the one-liners and then calling it acting.  It is hard to watch him as he was once so talented as a teen and now he is just a former shell of himself much like Edgar is in the film.  There is a training sequence in the film that shows Edgar practicing with various weapons after taking a number of years off from killing vampires.  He is predictably, quite terrible but when heading off into a den of bloodthirsty monsters, how good do you need to be?  Strangely, Feldman’s bizarre performace grows on you.

Yes, I am hotter than you both.

The rest of the cast was not much better with supermodel and budding actress Tanit Phoenix as the femme fatale Gwen,and Casey B. Dolan who plays Edgar’s friend Zoe, who also happens to have a secret all her own as well as harbouring a crush on Edgar.  Returning to the franchise is Jamison Newlander as Alan Frog, much older and a vampire to boot, but still loyal to his brother.  He does not have a lot to do, not that he had a lot to do in the first feature film either, but with the few lines he does have, he does a fair job and it actually sounds as if he is trying to do the best he can, where Feldman always seems like he is overcompensating and trying far too hard.

The film flashes back to the original a few times over the course of the film and there is even a shot of Edgar visiting Sam’s grave.  In a moment where fiction mirrors reality as it was fairly big news at the time, these scenes were in deference to Corey Haim who had passed away and it is both Edgar and Feldman saying goodbye to a friend.

Lost Boys: The Thirst is not the film you want to watch if you want to experience something good about this franchise as it will not make the best impression.  It is as generic a vampire movie as one can get with all of the same familiar tropes that many sport and no innovation to speak of.  It is not any worse that one of SyFy’s original pictures, but it is not any better either.  It is a shame that what held such promise turned into two inferior sequels, but such is the case most of the time when there is no steady hand to guide the ship, or anyone from the original creative team to give input.  The best thing in and about this movie are the Frog Brothers and while their acting might not be totally up to snuff, they kind of grow on you.  Funny enough, this film leaves it wide open for another sequel or sequels which at some point, is bound to happen.  Hopefully, they just let it rest.

2.5 out of 5